Near Enemy Not so Near

This book was muddled, plodding and difficult to get through. After reading it, I remember next to nothing about it, not the characters, plot, situations, locations... None of it, not on iota. I'm beginning to wonder if I actually read the book or not.

Comic Book Creation part 2

Here is part 2 of my comic creation thought processes. This was done with a shorter version of a hero origin story from another of my comics, Assault. I was able to cut it down to 10 pages for an online comic anthology called Red-Slime magazine. This time I actually worked with an editor to clean things up a bit and it showed.

Assault - Thief to Hero Webcomic page 1

Assault - Thief to Hero webcomic page 1, written by Timm Gillick, art by Josh Allar, edited and lettered by Jay Goldberg. First appeared in Red-Slime.net

PAGE 01

This story has a long and sometimes boring backstory as to how it came about. Firstly, the main character started off as something of Iron Man if he had stolen all the technology instead of inventing it himself.

His name came from a list I made at the Washington, Illinois Main Library. I remember it distinctly even though it was almost a quarter century ago. I needed some new superheroes for an upcoming role playing game, and I grabbed a thesaurus as this was well before the internet, and looked up the word "fight." In the lists of synonyms and antonyms, I found some interesting words, and made a list of the ones I thought would make some good superhero names. Assault was one of them.

The reason I did some character creation that way was I preferred the simpler names for heroes, following the KISS rule: Keep It Simple, Stupid. I also combined some here and there for some team names, and the Circus-13 Universe was born, but it wasn't called that back then.

At one time I liked the name of Excalibur Comics, and a former friend gave me a small trinket of a sword stuck in a stone which I still have today. Then it became *shudder* Whispering Lion Comics. I still don't know what made me decide on that name, but I am glad it didn't last long.

Eventually I had a conversation with someone who mentioned some of my "juggling" abilities with certain storylines and characters and said I belong in a circus. Add to that a recent conversation I had had with another friend about the number 13 and they just fell together.

Ten plus years later and the name is becoming known in certain areas, mostly for audio drama, but recently for the comics that actually inspired them.

PAGE 02

At first I wanted the two guys in the story, Assault and Armor, to have broken into a high-tech lab and steal the plans for a new exo-skeleton suit like Iron Man, but they fought about what to do with it. They ended up splitting the plans in their fight. Assault ended up with all the weaponry, and Armor ended up with all the defensive stuff. That plan still holds true, but extended out a bit when I rewrote this story.

I played around with the ideas until I found one I liked. That there is still the high-tech lab, but instead of them stealing the plans, why not steal the full thing? But how to get that done? I introduced the aliens. Only one appears in this short origin story, but the other alien species is mentioned.

With that happening, the alien crash, recovery of the alien, etc., it made it easier for the technology to be acquired by our thief. The second story in this title, Enmity and Armor, takes it to the next step and his partner finally acquires the defensive suit.

Randall aka Assault, becomes a hero, and the Circus-13 Universe was born, at least in audio comic format, with this story. It has since been expanded upon with a crossover in the second story arc, and the universe grows further with more history in the title Dragonwolf, but no crossover as of yet. Well, in Dragonwolf's second issue, there is a mention of ATLAS Labs, and a couple characters from the second Assault story, but nothing more than that.

Next I'll talk about how this particular iteration of this story came about, finally, in comic book form.


PAGE 03

A number of years ago now, I placed an ad on a website (don't remember the name and can't find it now) as a Comic Writer looking for projects. I was contacted by a man named Jay Goldberg, the very same one who edited and lettered this comic. He was putting together a project called Red-Slime, which was a comic book anthology of stories two to ten pages in length, published monthly as an online web comic. He collected artists from Deviant Art, and writers from various other sources including the one on which I had placed the ad.

He requested stories in comic book format (no prose), judged the style of the story and paired it up with an artist whose style matched the tone and theme of the story. This is how Josh Allar was brought on to draw this story.

I had to send some of my character designs along to make sure that Josh's images matched my vision for what I had created. Josh really liked the character of the alien in the bottle so much that after he and I discussed some of the back story on this tale, he did a couple sketches of Roju, the alien. Both of them ended up being used by Mr. Goldberg for Red-Slime, the black and white drawing was used for the cover of the issue in which this story appeared, and a color version, similar in theme to Roju coming out of the wreckage of his downed craft, was used as the cover of another issue which nothing I wrote appeared in.

So even though I only contributed to two issues of Red-Slime, a character of mine appeared on the cover of a third issue.

PAGE 04

Now you know the history behind this comic and how it came to be, both in the original full story in audio format, and as this abbreviated comic adaptation. As far as this iteration goes, there are a lot of things I like about it, and a couple here and there that I don't. Much like my commentary on the Dragonwolf pages, I will try to explain both sides, and on each individual page to keep things clear.

First off, let me say that Josh Allar is an amazing artist. He has a very simple style that is very clear and concise. I have experimented in coloring this comic, much like I have the Dragonwolf one, and to much better success because of Josh's style. He doesn't shy away from backgrounds, and finds ways around it if the panel doesn't really call for it.

However, on this page, the last panel is one of the few I don't like as much as I probably should. that tank is at least 8-10 feet tall and full of a liquid that isn't water. Think bacta tank in The Empire Strikes Back. And with an over-sized alien in it, that glass has got to be thick. The action of Randall striking the glass with that pipe doesn't look like he could really break it with just the one blow.

But then again, this is a comic book, and who knows how strong that guy really is, or maybe he can find weak points in things, which is how he is able to get into such a high-tech facility unnoticed (it's not, but you'd have to <a href="http://circus13productions.com/wordpress/category/original-audio/assault/">listen to the audio comic</a> to find out the full story).

PAGE 05

As opposed to the Dragonwolf comic, which I wrote 20 some years ago, Assault is much more recent, both the audio comic and this comic. I think the difference in writing styles shows a vast improvement in the two, both in structure and in content. The pace keeps moving on this one whereas Dragonwolf can seem to drag on with a lot of talking, some more talking, then even more talking.

The dialogue is still there in Assault, but it is trimmed back, not as wordy, and the scenes don't extend out longer than they have to. But this is also a different beast, so to speak. This comic was forced to be trimmed down to fit onto 10 pages. I actually had an editor to help pare it down and get it to a workable length and still get the story complete.

It is definitely a lot shorter than I had hoped. But then again, I had hoped for the full 72 page graphic novel the three episode audio comic could be, if I found an artist willing to commit with deferred payment from ad revenue as the only payment for it. One thing that some people don't get is that yes, I do believe artists should be paid for their work with real money. But what about all the "art" I have created by writing this stuff in the first place? Do I not deserve anything for the work I've done for all that effort? The "indie comic" scene of amateurs looking to break into the biz seem to think that artists are more valuable for it. I agree to a point. It's not a comic without the art. More on that next page.

PAGE 06

Can you have a comic without art? That is a question I posed on the page five commentary. The short answer is no you can't. However, you can have a comic with really shitty art and a great story, and people will love it. Can you have a comic that is the opposite, with awesome art and really shitty writing? There are some who would say "We already do, all over the professional industry."

My answer is that there are a lot of comics out there that look beautiful, but the story, characters, and themes are lacking something. I won't name names, but what would you call a powerful anti-hero who has massive powers given to him by an ethereal being, but he's sad so he lives with the homeless in an alley? Does that sound interesting? The art is gorgeous and was revolutionary in its day, changing styles in a lot of ways. But what about the character? I found him simplistic, hard to connect with, not a lot of depth.

Meanwhile one of my favorite indie comics, which has been distributed by multiple publishers, has a cartoonish style, very simple, but very deep characters, retelling a certain cultures myths and history through this anthropomorphic animal. And yet more people know the homeless "hero's" name than the character in the more simple art comic.

So which is more important, the story or the art? I agree that both are needed for it to be a "comic" but is one really more important than the other? Do you read comics based on the artist, or the writer? Do you read a title because of who wrote it or who drew it? Or is it sometimes both?

PAGE 07

Okay, enough of the rambling and ranting about the industry. I really should be focusing more on the comic you are reading.

This page has another panel I am not to sure about. The first one. In the script and my mind, the way I had envisioned this particular shot (no pun intended) was for a small protrusion to come up on Randall's arm which would aim at the security guard and then blast him. The way Josh drew it, it looks more like it is coming from Randall's palm. It could be the way it was interpreted, which is fine. I am so darn happy to have an actual comic I wrote that I don't want to quibble about little things like that.

But that does lead to another item that differed from my concept to the final product. The actual symbiotic suit. Every picture I had that I sent of the character, both my initial designs as well as cleaner drawings done by my buddy Germaine Wood, not one of them ever implied the suit to look metallic or as clean and orderly I guess you'd say, as what Josh drew. I don't know if Mr. Goldberg made an editorial decision and didn't tell me, or what. But the suit is supposed to be very organic, much like a Venom version of the Witchblade. The Witchblade looks metallic, but somewhat organic in an H. R. Giger sort of way. Venom is almost like an ooze, and always has been. Assault's symbiote was a combination of those two. Actually the basis for it becoming an organic symbiote rather than actual technology was the syndicated show Earth: Final Conflict where the good guys had a small symbiote attached to their arm.

PAGE 08

This is a page I am very proud of. Mr. Allar did a stupendous job getting all this action crammed onto one page. My favorite panels are the first two and the last one. The first two help convey the speed at which Randall and Roju are flying through and out of ATLAS Labs. And then when he realizes he doesn't quite have the flying thing down, his expression is very well done.

Speaking of expressions, Randall's expression in the last panel shows worry, even with a simple, sparse use of detail on his face. This panel, along with the first two, I think shows off Mr. Allar's style better than anything. He is showing the full meaning of the image, and all it implies, but in a very clear, and concise drawing.

This goes back to the whole "Which is more important, the artist or a writer" bit I brought up earlier. Does the artwork in this page--just as an example, I am not knocking Josh's contribution or artistic abilities in any way--outweigh the writing of this page? Does Randall's dialogue in the last panel, without the image at all, convey enough worry that even if Randall's face were covered with a mask, the point would still be made? On the flip side, could the image stand alone without Randall's words to show his concern for his friend that he forgetfully left behind?

I think either of them could work, both the dialogue without his expression, or the artwork alone. That, to me, is what makes comics a great medium. They are both dynamic and static at the same time, with the combination of good art and good writing bringing more to the whole than the sum of its parts.

PAGE 09

Now we are at the next to last page, and the action is still rolling, with Randall having to rescue David, who fell behind the flying figure. The third panel on this page is one of my favorites in terms of things I've written.

The characters are thieves. They steal things that don't belong to them and, depending on what it is, sell it for profit. That is how this story started, before page one of this comic. Randall and David broke in to ATLAS Labs with the intent of finding something in the Research &amp; Development section to then sell to a competitor for an exorbitant fee. That is why David's gun he found eventually doesn't work.

That being said, these two guys, while looking out for each other to a point--like Randall going back for him--they are still selfish and think mainly of themselves. That is why I like the third panel. David mentions how "this thing" is amazing without specifying what "this thing" is. Randall assumes it is the symbiotic suit, because not only is it amazing, but it just saved David. However David is thinking of the gun that he stole and what it can do.

Part of this selfishness is what leads to their eventual split because they can't agree on everything, especially with the direction Randall's life takes with the symbiote, and David feels left behind. Rather than feeling good for his friend's accomplishments and how he's moving on, David gets jealous and wants things to go back to the way they were, with Randall being in charge with more free time, and David riding his coattails.

But that is another tale for another time, or you can just go listen to <a href="http://circus13productions.com/wordpress/category/original-audio/assault/">Assault II: Enmity and Armor</a> on circus13productions.com.

PAGE 10

And here is the last page, a splash page, something I prefer to use sparingly. I have mentioned elsewhere why I prefer a splash page as either the first or last page, but think it bears repeating.

One thing I've studied a lot of over the past 20 years isn't just writing for comics, but also photography and cinematography, well filmmaking in general, but cinematography applies the most here.

The main thing I learned from cinematography as it could apply to comics is the establishing shot. One thing you see over and over again in films and TV shows but probably don't realize it, is the establishing shot. It is usually the first shot of the scene, usually to show not only the location of the scene, but also to establish (hence the name) where the characters are in relation to each other and the location. After that is set up, viewers will have an internal map of where everything and everyone is so that the ensuing conversation or action doesn't get confusing.

A splash page used on a first page will help as an establishing shot, it can serve the same purpose. If you look back at page one of this story, you will see three panels, the main one is the establishing shot of the lab, with the tank in the extreme foreground, and the trapdoor Randall and David use in the back. The next two panels then focus on that.

A splash page at the end, like this one, will tie things up, if the actual end of the story, or will show some big plot twist that will continue in the next issue. If you've ever read Kick Ass, you'll know what I mean by the bit plot twist, especially at the end of issue one.

Comic Book Creation part 1

I have been a writer for a long time, over half my life. I have done scribblings here and there since I was a teen. I have been finding a lot of these old things (most of them unfinished) and been putting them out there into the aether for people to read.

One of these was a comic I wrote back in 1993-1994. This was long before there was such a term as "web comic," but that is what it is today. I scanned the pages (after finding someone to finally draw them) in 1998, and kept them on floppy disk for years before I finally was able to get them updated and upgraded.

Once on my site (comics.circus13productions.com), I worked on updating the SEO on the pages to draw more traffic. To do that, each page needed more text to improve its rankings in the search engines. I decided to create a commentary on my thoughts and the thought processes behind writing the comic.

The comic is in black and white, but is now being colored by yours truly and re-released (you can read the black and white version here, or the new color version which just started here).

Anyway, here is the commentary for all 38 pages plus the cover:

PAGE 00

Dragonwolf, aka Akira Blackwolf, is the son of a Mohawk Indian and a Japanese woman. He comes from two distinct cultures, and tries to incorporate both as he works as a "troubleshooter" in New York City.

Dragonwolf was originally called "Dragonheart" when I first created the character over 20 years ago, then along came a movie of the same name, so I decided to change it, pulling in a little more of the two cultures of the main character. I scanned the original inked pages way back in 1998 and kept them on floppy disks for years until I was able to update them, clean them up and present them as they are now. All of it is from the original 1998 draft. I updated a couple things and have written the second and third issues, just looking for an artist to continue this story.

PAGE 01

I'll never forget how excited I was to finally have a comic book page in my hand of something I had written. It hasn't changed in 20+ years either. I was overjoyed with Will (at the time has preferred to be called "Bill") and seeing what I had written come to life.

When I first wrote this, I knew nothing of comic book script format or page layouts, and Bill didn't have much in the way of formal comic training either. I wrote the story in prose form, which is partly why it turned out to be almost forty pages! But since then I've learned a LOT, and newer pages of this story, and others, will have a better flow, rhythm and presentation.

But for now, we can look back on this for what it was, my first real attempt at telling a story I thought needed to be told. Granted, a miscommunication later on in this issue presented me with a problem that I was able to solve, and help build out the bigger world of Circus-13.

Dragonwolf, while on hold searching for an artist willing to commit to a few pages, if not two more issues of this story, will be migrating over to the Circus-13 Productions audio drama page. Adapting the comic to an audio drama is going on right now with hopes to have it recording before the end of 2016!

Who is this bald guy? Where is he going? A very slow start to what will be a mystery/super-hero/action story known as Dragonwolf!

PAGE 02

Here we are on page 2 of Dragonwolf. Still no explanation of who the bald guy is, but now we can see a door that looks like it might say "Dragonwolf, Inc."

I'm not too crazy about the layout of this page. The top left panel looks odd with his head there, and then most of his body in the main panel. I think it looks like he has either a tiny head or a giant body. But as I said before, I was so new to the comic thing that neither Bill/Will nor I knew much of anything about page layouts except what we read in comics back then. We never studied the style or anything, we just did it. Would I do it differently now given the chance? Some things yes, like this page. Some things no, but I do know I have grown a lot as a writer in general and a comic writer in specific. I also enjoyed learning to ink using Adobe Photoshop. I had read a few books on it, and I have some artistic ability, so I decided to give it a shot, and now whenever I actually draw something, I prefer to ink using the computer. The lines are much cleaner and crisper.

I even experimented with coloring these pages, and may get around to posting them sometime. But not just yet.

PAGE 03

And now we finally get a look at our hero, Dragonwolf, aka Akira Blackwolf, the half Japanese, half Mohawk Indian. Some people who have read this asked if what he was doing was meditating. The answer is yes, he is meditating. Not sure if that came across really well in the panel, but at least with his eyes closed, and being interrupted, you can tell he wasn't just sitting and staring out the window.

I wasn't really happy with the last panel of just his eyes, but it works for a black and white comic. When I tried coloring the page, it looks weird with nothing but a pinkish flesh-tone in that panel. I think some creative coloring techniques might help it a bit. I didn't want to stray too far from Will/Bill's vision of how he drew it. This was a big collaboration somewhat in the old Mighty Marvel style. I say somewhat because the traditional Mighty Marvel way was for Stan "the Man" Lee give a basic plot summary to Mr. Jack Kirby (usually), with the main beat points of what happens in the story. Mr. Kirby would then go draw the pages and give them back to Stan to write the dialogue.

What we did here was, I wrote the story in a prose style, including lots of description, then handed it to Bill/Will to draw it out. He made sure to leave enough room for dialogue bubbles, as you will see in future pages.

Did it work? To a point. There are some pages I think worked better than others. What would I do differently? Pare back on the dialogue a lot. Less is more.

PAGE 04

We get a little more information about Dragonwolf, aka Akira Blackwolf, as well as who the mysterious bald man is. James Grant, an acquaintance of Akira's dad, has some kind of problem, otherwise why would he be visiting a troubleshooter.

This is one of those pages I would shorten a lot. Didn't really need to have Akira offer a soda, and take the time to walk to his desk. After the first panel, all the rest could have been removed, with a couple lines of the dialogue moving to other panels, most of them pulled from the next page.

An editor would have helped with this at this point, because here we are four pages in and still don't know what's going on yet, except we have two people having a conversation. And we still don't know what the conversation is about, except their names and that one character knows the other's father. Not really moving the story along yet. But this is a way to learn, and it only cost me some time. And I do like Will's art. He brought some dynamics to the characters, some things I hadn't considered on how it would look on a page.

I had no descriptions of Akira's office other than what the characters interacted with, such as the mini-fridge, the door, and the desk with at least two chairs: one for Akira, one for prospective clients. Will added the bookcase with a couple trophies, books, and a katana. As far as the rest of this issue goes, that katana isn't used and is merely decorative. Could he end up using one before the story is over, even that one? Could be. You'll have to keep reading the story to find out.

PAGE 05

Happy Halloween! Today marks not only All Hallow's Eve but also the 9th anniversary of Circus-13 Productions, our founding site full of audio drama goodness! This day was marked with the release of part 1 of X-men: Days of Future, Past! in the two part series. What? You haven't heard it? <a title="Circus-13 Productions Presents the Uncanny X-men" href="http://circus13productions.com/wordpress/category/fan-based-audio/x-men/" target="_blank">Go listen to it here</a>!

Page five gives us more information about why James Grant is hiring Dragonwolf, Inc. This is another page that could have been shortened. I think that some of this could be combined into the previous page thus eliminating the need for this page altogether.

When I originally wrote this story, Akira was supposed to be a regular detective story but with a "hook" of him being half-Japanese, half-Mohawk, and using martial arts and maybe some mystical shaman "medicine" rituals to complete his cases. So this was just a kidnapping case. With the prospect of actually making a comic book, when I met Will/Bill, I decided to take the story and up the stakes a little bit and make it more "comic book" and less "traditional detective story."

I think I've mentioned before that a misunderstood description later on in the story made me think long and hard about how to update the story for part 2, but I'll discuss that on that particular page. But with that mistake, I was able to more easily transition this story into more of a comic book story, and incorporate it into the comic book universe I've been building over the last 20 years, that if I had kept it just as a detective story, it wouldn't have the importance to the Circus-13 Mythology that it has now.

More on that later.

PAGE 06

This page is a strange one. It's definitely one that could have been edited better, and shortened, but beyond that, I had lost some text.

After these pages were originally drawn (on regular 8.5" x 11" paper, yeesh), I had inked them and started lettering them, in the most wrong and incorrect way. They looked horrible. After I had them scanned, I tried coloring and lettering them using Paint Shop Pro, but one thing I didn't understand way back there in 1997/1998 was layers. So I had tried doing all the coloring on one layer, a big no-no as it can ruin the inked pages.

This was the last page I tried coloring back then. But what I did was color over all the text between the two characters in the last panel. At the time, I had a copy of it so I could just retype it in when I lettered it, but life got in the way, the actual drawn page is lost somewhere (I'll probably find it unpacking in the years to come), so the original text is gone. I knew the gist of what was being said, so I had to figure out a way to incorporate what I generally knew them to be saying and the new direction I had to take the story in the next two issues. I am happy with what I have there, but really wish I had a chance to redo the whole thing and tighten up the whole issue both with art and dialogue.

That being said, this is yet another page that could be shorter and bring in parts of the next page and probably lose another page to proper editing.

PAGE 07

Oooooh, a new name. David Black. I have used this guy in way too many stories that I have written, including a traditional detective series that never went anywhere except lost in time. Seriously, it was written on a Commodore 128 computer and saved on 5 1/4" floppy disks, and any hard copies have disappeared long ago.

Anyway, David Black, aka Turmoil, will be one of my favorite bad guys to write. He is barely in this issue, but he is the main catalyst for the story. Spoiler, yes he did "kidnap" Jennifer, but not in any way that you would think.

This is yet another page to shorten up, make tighter, not just in the dialogue, but now we have 7 pages, finally have a plot, and a story, and a place to go, but we are seven pages in. Pick up any other comic and look at page seven, even a first issue, and see how far along you are in the story. I like the pacing of the first couple pages, but it can be tightened up a bit. These past couple pages can be tightened up a lot more. This is one of those things as the more you learn, the more you know, the better your product (in this instance my writing) can be.

I haven't talked to Bill/Will in a few months as life has gotten in the way as it tends to do, but I am sure there are some things he'd like to do differently on this comic as well. I remember him saying when he was drawing this issue (the only one he did), that he wasn't happy with some of the panels, or even entire pages. I think this was one of them, but it was still early. You can see his artwork grow, and his panels tighten up as the comic goes on.

PAGE 08

This one was a little different in the fact that I used Google Sketchup for the apartment building. It's something I first saw in a book about creating comics digitally by Freddie Williams, Jr. He and his wife spent a lot of time creating the Daily Planet Building in Sketchup, along with a few surrounding blocks of downtown Metropolis. Then when he's needed that skyline, he just moves the "camera" around to get the angle he needs, and BOOM! Instant background. So I am trying it out a couple times in Dragonwolf.

The next Sketchup background is coming in a couple pages, and it looks more realistic than a line drawing, but it was one that I liked for the building and decided to use it. It is definitely something that will improve as we get used to using it more, even to go so far as to create some of our own backgrounds eventually.

I really like how this page turned out with the new background. The original picture was an overly simple drawing of a building. I really like Sketchup and plan on using it a lot in the future as I can. I tried a few different buildings for this page and thought this one looked most like a New York style building, at least in the Circus-13 Universe. I am sure there are some actual New Yorkers who would look at this and say, "Yeah, that doesn't look New York enough for me." But I didn't do it for accuracy, I did it for aesthetics. Just wait until part 2 where the team goes to Chicago! Wait, did I say team? I did say team! You'll have to see who is on the team in the next issue!

PAGE 09

I had some fun with inking this one. The fingerprints are Photoshop brushes, a different one for each print. As for the graffiti, I used my pen and tablet to actually draw it in Photoshop using the airbrush to give it that very soft edge. Something different.

And yet another page that could be shorter, and one that was hard to edit for the mistake/updating I had to do for the story. I struggled with ways to change this, and have trouble describing those decisions because I don't want to give away too much plot ahead of time. But since this page has been out for over a year, as has the rest of the comic, I think I am safe to divulge it.

The original story was that Jennifer was kidnapped. A normal, 15 year old girl, and Akira needed information to follow up on, with her friends, photo, etc. But when Akira finally catches up with David Black and the the bad guy escapes, he was supposed to pick up a large bundle in a laundry sack and run out of his apartment with her. It was supposed to be the kidnapped girl in the sack.

However, Mr. Ward misinterpreted what a "laundry sack" is, in particular how large they can be, and that you very well could fit a petite teen girl easily inside one. Before anyone gets bent out of shape, I had a friend who was a petite fifteen year old girl prove it to me.

What Mr. Ward drew, however, was a small package that he picked up out of a laundry basket. So I had to come up with something else for this story, and I believe I did, even thought it won't be revealed until the next issue. I managed to turn a mistake into a better story overall, and I am glad I can do that. That being said, it was very difficult to incorporate that new plot into this page, and how to go about it without revealing too much, and I'm not sure if I like it or not.

PAGE 10

A continuation off the last page, and I like the first panel, but not so much the other two. The last one, I should have used the Sketchup taxi I use on other pages because that thing looks like a used jalopy that was probably broke when it was brand new.

Going off the comments from the last page, this is another that was hard to work into the new story and current mythology of the Circus-13 Universe. Why would you need a picture of a girl dead for decades, as well as fingerprints and list of her friends? None of them would be current, and none of them would help you find her as she is now, but I kept it in because I had to figure out something for him to look at, without James Grant actually giving up what was really going on, in the new storyline.

I still wonder how much background should go into some of these panels. I mean, this is supposed to be New York City, and unless Akira is actually interacting with someone, he is the only person in the panel. This page has him in Central Park. While the top one could have the rolling hills of grass behind him, it could just as easily have James Grant's building, since Akira just walked across the street. And there should be other people as well. Even on a weekday in spring/summer (since he's wearing a tank top), there would still be plenty of people around. But looking at this the way it is, he could be in Mayberry, RFD for the lack of people around him. Maybe adding some kind of background, even if it is kind of blurry or indistinct would work.

PAGE 11

This is another page with a background made with Google Sketchup. I found a nice police station and made a screengrab once I got it positioned right. I like this model more since the black and white lines match the rest of the art so well, compared to James Grant's apartment building, but if this page ever gets colored, it might not be as impressive.

And oh look! Another new character! This is Police Sergeant Michael O'Donnell. I used the last name as characters in an independent film I started shooting years ago (and everyone looks too different to continue shooting it as is), as a couple of the main characters. I tend to re-use names of characters if the story they are in isn't going anywhere, and sometimes the stories do end up going somewhere and I have to make sure they get kept separate, as is the case with Sgt. O'Donnell and Stephen O'Donnell in the film Words of the Prophet.

If I remember correctly, I had no description of Sgt. O'Donnell in the original writing, just that he was a cop. I'm not sure if the precinct is correct, or anything else, but it all works, and MY New York I'm sure is vastly different from the real New York. The locations aren't really important, as are their look because not a lot takes place outside there yet, not anything that will be that noticeable, but that may change, and if it does, I'll be sure to go for some accuracy.

Sgt. O'Donnell doesn't have a lot of impact on this issue, but will further down the line. I hope for him to become a bigger role in future stories, much like Det. West on CW's The Flash series.

PAGE 12

This page, I think, more than any other truly reveals the age of this comic. I wrote it around 1992, and it was drawn around that time as well, probably as late as 1994, and this is really what computers looked like. I had no idea what a police department database search engine looked like, and neither did Mr. Ward. Heck I don't think the term "search engine" was even known at the time. I did attempt to update the look of the screen a bit, to try and bring it a little out of the dark ages.

I like Mr. Ward's use of silhouette in the next to last panel as it isn't overused on this page. This also is a couple of first good looks at Sgt. O'Donnell, as well as demonstrating a couple things about his character and the world they are currently in. Akira is wearing a tank top-ish shirt. It is a little 80's with the low cut sides that went into the early 90's when this was drawn. It shows either spring or summer in New York. Sgt. O'Donnell has his tie undone and loose around his neck. This is a sign of heat as well as comfort, casualness, and a bit of bucking the system as he is still at work and on the clock.

This shows his attitude towards authority, as well as his instantly helping his friend Akira Blackwolf. Most people--as far as I know, licensed private investigator or not--can't just walk into a police station and ask to see a police report for a missing person, especially if they aren't related to the victim. So it would seem that Sgt. O'Donnell might have a special relationship with our hero.

PAGE 13

Here is another page I think could be shorter. It's nothing more than an info dump dressed up like a "clue" for his mystery. I also provide a little background on David Black, not a lot, but some more insight into what type of guy he is.

By looking at Sgt. O'Donnell's computer you can see that this was written and drawn in the 90's. It can still be a bit relevant today as not all police departments, especially very large ones, can update and upgrade everything in a timely manner. The operating system might be newer, but there are still a lot of CRT monitors out there being used to one degree or another.

As for some of the artwork on this panel. It isn't easy trying to stretch out what is just a conversation between two people, into seven panels of unique and exciting artwork. Bill/Will used silhouettes throughout in some of these "lotta dialogue" scenes to help break up the monotony of two talking heads yakking at each other. He gets a little creative with the angles (which you see here), that makes it look a little odd with the hand in one panel, and the face at the edge in the other. He tries some different things with negative space later, so you can see Akira's sunglasses as white in a black silhouette of the character.

Mr. Ward also threw hands in the mix like guest appearances by Thing from the Addams Family. It can break up the monotony, but can be a bit confusing as to who is gesticulating without some kind of distinct marker. The lack of a sleeve shows this as Akira's hand both times. His sunglasses make an appearance in his hand next page as a distinction.

PAGE 14

Here we get our first good close-up look at Sgt. O'Donnell. Grey hair, moustache, typical middle aged police sergeant detective working at his desk. We get a little more info about Akira's habits and what the good sergeant thinks about Akira's actions, and his disapproval. He also disapproves of "The Viking Gang" which might be our first clue as to "the team" I mentioned on a previous page's notes.

...

...

Okay, it <strong><em>is</em></strong> the team I mentioned earlier. Erik is the leader, but I give no more information about them yet, as I do want their character reveals to be more organic in nature than what boils down to a blog post about the web comic.

The bottom half of the page shows more of Mr. Ward's creative silhouettes I talked about earlier, with a "normal" one in panel 3, then one two sunglasses and hand silhouettes in panels four and six. At this point we can easily tell that is Akira's outline by artwork alone, if the bubbles weren't in the frame, due to the shades.

And speaking of shades. That is definitely Akira's hand holding those sunglasses in panel two. He uses them to gesture to Sgt. O'Donnell as he defends Erik and the Vikings Gang to the sergeant, who refutes said argument. The content could be tightened up a bit on this page as well, but overall I think this is one of the better ones for writing. I would definitely do it differently this time around, but overall, I tend to think this page works better than some of the others, especially some of the more recent ones.

Akira still has some people to see in order to gain more information about his case, where we will meet a couple more recurring characters.

PAGE 15

This one is a little different as I have a couple 3D vehicles on the page. The taxi in the first two panels is the same model. The background in the second panel is a model of a storage facility. And the "rocket cycle" is another model. This model will show up on another page once Akira gets to his father's house.

What do you think of the 3D models in use? Do they add to the story, detract, too simple?

This page could have been eliminated altogether I think. It doesn't add anything except that he stores his bike outside of town. I got to use some more 3D models from Sketchup though, and if nothing else, this gave me some practice with using them as backgrounds in the comic.

Even after seeing this page, and after the edits and everything else, I decided to keep all the pages, no matter how much they don't add to the story probably because this was my first comic, and I wanted to keep it as completely intact as possible. It is detrimental to the comic overall? I don't think so. I think having this piece of "history" in place helps show a lot to my original writing style compared to how much I've changed in the past twenty years.

Moving forward, this entire issue might get rewritten and redrawn at some point, to tighten up both the story and the writing, as well as removing some of the inconsistencies like what really happened to Jennifer and how Akira should have been going about it, what with the envelope of information he got from her father and how he would have done things differently.

PAGE 16

Here is another page with another 3D Sketchup model, the motorcycle again. I'm still of two minds about these. I think if we worked harder to make our own Circus-13 models more to our liking rather than finding some that look pretty close, I'd like this better. That being said, until we find the time to make the models, or find someone willing to make the models for Circus-13, I think using some from the Warehouse will work just fine.

Two new characters, both recurring as they are Akira's father and grandfather. Dad doesn't seem to approve of his son's abilities or activities. He seems to want Akira to be more "normal," but Grandpa doesn't seem to mind, and even encourages him. To a point.

The town of Valhalla is real, and I decided to use it as soon as I saw it. It ties in with Akira's childhood friends now being called The Vikings Gang. Valhalla. for anyone who doesn't know, is kind of like Viking heaven, where the Viking warriors go when they die gloriously in battle, to fight all day in front of Odinn, and feast and fornicate all night long.

Since the Mohawk Indians are from the northern part of New York state, and Valhalla is there, it seemed like a match made in heaven as things fell neatly into place as I was first writing this. Which I did without the aid of the internet mind you. All the research I did for maps, locations, and the like were done with real maps, road atlases, etc., and things I could find at the local library, using a "traditional" card catalog. Wasn't easy, but I bet I could still do it today if there was still one around.

PAGE 17

This page is a huge info dump. I really want to change it. Some of the conversation is a bit too much character reveal that could be done better, cleaner, and--more importantly--shorter.

I like the relationship Akira has with his father, it brings out some of his own character, defending himself to his father. And we haven't met his mother yet (and we won't in this issue or the next), so there is no explanation as to where she is. Is she dead (no), are they divorced, is she working while he is on a day off? That is something I didn't fully explore in this issue at all, but hope to at least give some information about it in issue three or beyond.

One thing some people may notice by now, the only female character so far is the victim, and I've already given it away that she isn't around any more. Something bigger happened to her than just a mere kidnapping. I do have a female character coming, and I think most people will enjoy it. This is one of the ways I know I have grown as a writer, not being so male-centric in my writing, but trying to keep things as open and diverse as possible because that is the world I live in, not sure about some people though.

Politics aside, I create to reflect the things I like. And one thing that has changed since I wrote this, is making things as broad and appealing to people of all walks of life. Are Native Americans going to like this because the main character is half-Mohawk? I don't know. Same thing for Japanese people. I am doing my best to make sure I have the cultures in particular as accurate as I can represent so as to not dishonor or insult any culture. We'll see how that works.

PAGE 18

This is one of my favorite pages in the whole comic. Mr. Ward outdid himself with some of the crazy silhouettes and imagery to liven up some rather bland talking head moments. I had to update the information about cocaine because at the time, I just plain didn't know that it existed long before the 1960's. But luckily this was misinformation that was very easy to fix. The CIA used to export cocaine from Vietnam in large shipments, as did other organizations, both governmental and private, domestic and foreign. Everybody was shipping cocaine. I could have written this off as another "specific to the Circus-13 Universe" fact, but thought I had already suspended disbelief once with the nature of the character using shaman magick (which has yet to be introduced) to fix problems, solve mysteries, etc. People not doing cocaine before the Vietnam War was just a bit too much.

By using the imagery of the soldier, both on patrol and using the drug, helped a lot with both the visual style of the story, but also to help break up the monotony of people talking at each other and not a lot of action yet. 18 pages (about 75% of most comics nowadays) and not one fight scene unless you count Sgt. O'Donnell getting upset about Akira asking his buddies in the Viking Gang for possible assistance. That is deplorable, but also sets the tone of this book I think. The story isn't just about a guy who goes out and punches people with magick just to get his point across, but also is a thinker and something of a diplomat, getting the information he needs without using his fists.

And that was something that appealed to me with indie comics as opposed to the big two (and still does).

PAGE 19

Akira's dad gives our intrepid hero more info on James Grant, Akira's client, and it's looking like James Grant isn't that stand up kind of guy.

This is another page where Mr. Ward pulled out some imagery to go along with what's being talked about, rather than just focusing on the two talking heads, namely Akira and his father. The third panel was one he was most proud of, and one I really liked, with the imagery of the typical "monkey on your back" of James Grant trying to kick is coke habit and failing. Having James accept his demons and work with this, exemplified in the last panel, combined with Mr. Ward's ever enduring silhouette usage, rounds out the page.

I am of two minds about this page. I believe it could be shorter, and yes I know there is a typo on the page. But some of the imagery would have to go if I did shorten the page, and I'm not sure if that would be a good thing. Mr. Ward and I learned a lot when making this comic 20 years ago. First off, we learned that we needed work. It's not that anything we did was bad, per se, but that what we did really needed an editor to tweak the story, the art, and tighten it up. I noticed I've used that phrase a lot on some of these page descriptions: "tighten it up." And while it may be cliched it still holds true that this comic is kind of loose. The conversations are long, and while they may be good in a novel, novella, or short story, they don't work that well in a comic book.

That being said, I think to a point it DOES work in a weekly webcomic of one page per week. More on that next page.

PAGE 20

Akira continues to gain information from his father about his client, and we learn a little more about Akira himself.

This is another "talking heads" page that needs to be shortened. We do learn more about Akira, and a little more about James Grant, and Akira's grandfather. But it does go on a bit.

Back to what I said at the end of the commentary on the last page, about this working for a weekly webcomic, all this extra talk. Hear me out. When reading a normal comic, either digital or "real," you can flip through the pages pretty quickly, and you don't need a whole lot of information per page. A weekly webcomic, though, even a "standard" length of 22-24 pages will take about 6 months to read (52 weeks in a year, half that is 26). So what happens when you have a page, like page 1 of Dragonwolf, that is just three panels of a guy walking. Not very exciting or memorable, right? But a page crammed full of information and dialogue, that stays with you more. It give you more to look at and read than a quick glance at three images. This page probably takes 30-60 seconds to read. Not a lot, mind you, but a lot longer than a quick scan of page 1 I bet.

And that's where I think a webcomic and a "real" comic differ. Once this is all collected into a full length digital comic and you can read it all in one sitting, however, it might seem more bloated in parts like this, three to four pages each of nothing but talking, talking, talking can get tiresome, I know, but as a weekly webcomic, I will stand by this presentation.

PAGE 21

And here again is yet another bloated, wordy page. Nine panels, and all of them crammed full of talking, especially that last one. Look at that thing! That is a TON of words for a single panel in a comic, especially one with eight other panels on the page. So yes, I say this page definitely needs to be tightened up. This whole scene does because we are now on the fourth page (I think) and they are still just talking. And we are also on page 21 of the comic, about standard length, and still no real action. Just talk talk talk talk talk.

We gain a lot of insight in this page, but it so needs to be pared down. I tried acting this page out with a couple friends, and it would take Akira forever to walk back to his motorcycle while having this conversation. This would be the first page to hit the chopping black on how I can shorten it. Despite what I have said about having a lot of information on a page being better for a weekly webcomic, this is one of those exceptions. A stellar exception in fact. There are a couple points that should stay in the story, like Akira's father's disapproval of Akira's chosen line of work, and grandfather dismissing Akira's Japanese heritage (more on that in a future issue). But the bulk of this page needs to go. This comic is already 38 pages long, and that is almost a double-issue, which has been done for a lot of first issues of new titles, but they usually have more action than this. All in all, I am happy with this story, because I think it is a new type of character, as I've said before, that thinks and talks as much as he punches (which is coming, I promise).

PAGE 22

Akira goes back to his office to see what he info he has about the kidnapper, one David Black.

Another 3D model of the taxi used again. I think I'm missing a certain setting in Sketchup (or maybe just the model I'm using) to get rid of that shading along the edges.

Next week, another splash page, but with a LOT more 3D models used.

At last we have some artwork denoting some information rather than just more talking heads. I am not happy with the thought bubble now as I was back then. Internal dialogue has very little place, much like narration, in what I write now. Establishing shots can help with giving a location, but if there isn't room, a small caption denoting the location works, but Akira's thoughts should be able to be conveyed through his facial expressions and not through obvious thought bubbles.

That being said, here are the things I like about this page. It is vastly different from the bloated pages recently with the huge info dumps, being on three panels, giving some information visually--albeit still using text--rather than through more dialogue. In this case, it is a "show don't tell" case done correctly. The image of David Black I always thought a little goofy, but adding "Police Sketch" to the bottom helps alleviate some of that goofiness as it should be a little off.

And once again, Mr. Ward did a great job of the office, with the edge of the bookcase, and then having the filing cabinet to one side. Thinking of how big this office would be, in New York, would probably cost about as much as an apartment with the size it is. There is room for the desk and chairs, filing cabinet, bookshelf, mini fridge, and enough room for him to meditate with nothing else near him. That is quite a bit of space.

PAGE 23

Akira puts in his first appearance as Dragonwolf as he hunts David Black - aka TURMOIL!

And finally, way back on page 23, a splash page no less, we finally get a first glimpse of the main character in costume... Sort of... Dragonwolf makes his appearance. A different take on Mr. Ward's now infamous silhouettes, both of the character and the skyline behind him.

One thing I did differently on this page was not to use Google Sketchup for the wall he is standing on, but just a brick wall modified to fit with perspective angles and removing the spots for the light. The light rays that are coming down, I had to come up with a way to show the light and yet keep the actual feel of the page. I ended up just putting a black layer at around 30% opacity over the spots where the light wasn't shining to get that effect. I think some of that effect is lessened by the actual light fixture being a stark white when everything else is so dark, but I attribute it to the style of the artwork on the page. Akira's cloak is supposed to be gray, but how to convey that in a silhouette with the moonlight, etc. So this would not be an easy image to present in color with the silhouette style Mr. Ward uses generously in this issue.

I do have a lot of these pages colored with flat colors at the moment, no shading, but didn't get this far into the issue. It is something that will be remedied eventually, as well as a lot of my other concerns about background and the like. Adding some color helps show certain walls, especially in Akira's office.

PAGE 24

Happy Friday the 13th. For today's comic, we introduce a new character, very ominous, perfect for Friday the 13th! Who is this mysterious woman and what does she have to do with Dragonwolf, Turmoil and the missing Jennifer Grant? Find out next week!

And now we get more of a glimpse of Mr. David Black, aka Turmoil, a better look at Dragonwolf--with the grey cloak this time--and a new character. This character was partially created by a former friend of mine. I think I will talk more about her on the next page as we get more info about her. For now, let's just say that the character is solely mine, the organization's name at least was the friend's, but it has morphed in the Circus-13 Universe.

Mr. Ward once again uses his silhouettes, but this time a little differently than before. The first panel is a straightforward one, as is the one on the right in the second panel. The one on the left in the second panel however, shows off the creative use. Making the inner edge of the cloak's hood, as well as parts of his eyes white, it still denotes that the character is in a lot of darkness, but we still need to see his eyes to see which way he is looking.

One thing I would change about this page is David Black's apartment interior. I had mentioned that this part is supposed to be in Hell's Kitchen in New York. Not a very rich neighborhood. David Black's apartment looks quite large, especially through that window. Speaking of that window, it is a large window to be showing out onto an adjacent rooftop that could easily be accessed. If he were to have a window like that, in an apartment like that, in New York, let alone Hell's Kitchen, it would be far more inaccessible than it is.

PAGE 25

Oh, look, another talking head page. This one is one of the necessary ones though. It shows not only that Dragonwolf is reluctant to fight if he doesn't have to, but that the new character also doesn't fight unnecessarily.  And while no silhouettes in this page, the last split panel does a more abstract version of Reesa that still denotes who the character is very easily.

As far as Reesa goes, this is a character that needed a little something extra when I introduced her. Her name is a variation of Theresa, which happens to be the name of a girl i was dating when I wrote this. The organization she works for is the Zaxin Assassin Clan. I had mentioned that a former friend had named it, but that is partially true. He had the name Zaxin Clan, that was a team of assassins, but I decided to use the Assassin in the middle of the name as well. That is the only similarity to what he had done and what I had done. My Zaxin Clan consists solely of women. No men allowed. They are all orphans, raised in the clan to fight and kill from as young an age as they can. While there is a little "Waif-fu" with some of the characters, Reesa is not one of them.

For those unfamiliar with the term "Waif-fu," it is applied usually to Joss Whedon stories, in particular Firefly and Buffy the Vampire Slayer where in the tiny, petite female character is able to best men and women (and occasionally demons and vampires) more than twice her size using only whatever martial arts she has. Physics and actual physicality generally don't come into play, and suspension of disbelief is stretched at times.

PAGE 26

Dragonwolf, although a capable fighter, would prefer to talk things out. Not so Reesa!

Finally, some action! Here we are way back on page 26, two pages longer than the standard 24-page length before there is any action on a page. What this page lacks in background, it makes up for in non-standard comic book fight scenes. Four panels, all the width of the page, Mr. Ward's signature silhouettes in panel three, and the hero reluctant to fight being attacked by a third potential antagonist in the story--after the lying liar James Grant lying by omission, and the target of the hunt David Black.

Mr. Ward hadn't drawn a lot of action scenes before this. I am not sure if drawing an action scene on an 8.5" x 11" paper hampered him, or just that it was an action scene unlike ones he had done before, which as I stated, weren't many. What I do know is this action sequence does a good job of making up for a total lack of action everywhere else in this issue. It is the only action sequence, and I do hope to maybe remedy that in a rewrite. I am not sure if I want to, though. While I know that I do need to do some rewrites and "tighten up" the story and the issue in general, I'm not sure if having any other fight scenes would work. One thing I know is that each scene has to have tension of some kind, conflict, which doesn't need to be physical. Looking over all the scenes, as denoted by a change of location, does have conflict. The establishing scenes, like Akira reading David Black's file, would be an introduction to this scene, so it's lack of conflict isn't troublesome.

PAGE 27

The fight between Dragonwolf and Reesa has attracted some attention!

More action! David Black even brought a gun to the fist fight. I want to say Mr. Ward's original pencils had David Black shooting through his own window, so there was broken glass, but I didn't think that most people would willingly shoot out the glass of their own window, especially on a nice air conditioned apartment.

I loved the image of Dragonwolf in the top panel. Those of you who have bothered to go look at the wallpaper pages may recognize this exact image in some of the downloadable wallpaper. I liked the picture that much. At the time Mr. Ward was drawing this, the only pictures I had of Dragonwolf were some designs that I had done myself, and I still cringe when I see them, so having this picture of a character I created was a god-send to me. Using this as a model, I redid some of my own drawings of the character and improved my own drawing abilities.

The last panel I like for various reasons. It shows Dragonwolf and Reesa's ability to dodge bullets, at least wildly fired shots. It also shows off Reesa's outfit in a bit more detail. This was one thing Mr. Ward had control over. I had no images of Reesa to give him when I handed him the story, and there wasn't much description as I recall. The design of the outfit, as he explained, was kind of an urban night camouflage, with the different lighter spots helping to break up just a plain black suit. It also made the outfit a bit more visually interesting. Reesa's abilities will be revealed more in coming stories, as is her background.

PAGE 28

The fight between Reesa and Dragonwolf continues. What is that bundle Turmoil is taking from the laundry basket?

More action as this scene continues! No action for 25+ pages and now we have more than one page of continues action. Not completely making up for lost time, but a good step.

And now we are at the page I mentioned a long time ago about Mr. Ward's misinterpretation of the story, particularly about the term "laundry bag." That is definitely a laundry basket, no argument there, but does the package he is taking from it large enough for a petite 15 year old girl? Not by any stretch of the imagination.

This is where the next issue takes the original kidnapping story and has to get creative about who Jennifer Grant really is (that actually is her in that laundry bundle), and why she can fit in a package so small. I am not going to give it away at all in this commentary. If for some reason the second issue does not get drawn, there will be an audio comic of this story sometime in the 2016-2017 so that anyone who wants to know what's going on can find out.

As for this story, Mr. Ward did a great job conveying Reesa's anger at our hero, and he went against using a silhouette in panel two, and you can see how having a black background can work to a character's advantage in grey cloak, but works against a reader trying to see said character. This is something a color version will help remedy with a bit more color tossed in, it will help make Dragonwolf pop out a bit in that pane, at least with the flesh-tone of his face.

PAGE 29

While Reesa and Dragonwolf are occupied, Turmoil takes advantage of the chance to get away.

Here is yet another page I am not overly fond of. I like the image of David Black actually running rather than trying to fight not one but two people after his hide. We know Dragonwolf's motivation for seeking out David Black, but we don't know Reesa's. Granted she's only been here for a couple pages, and we've heard David's name ever since the first few pages. But that isn't the reason for my dislike.

I also like the image at the bottom, in panel two. Dragonwolf, who we assume is a capable fighter due to this being his book, and being the title character and all, but here is his first offensive move and he misses. Reesa seems to be more formidable with just this one image. What I don't like about it is a lack of background--which has happened a lot in this issue--and the fact that there are only two panels on this page. For a page to have only two panels, with no dialogue, and minimal action--one guy is running away, and the fight shows a dodged kick--it is sorely lacking in storytelling ability.

To make these this page work as a two-panel page, it should have something more momentous in the action. A big reveal, or a major plot twist come to mind. Like if Reesa were to stab Dragonwolf, the titular character, in the stomach, THAT would be something that would warrant a large panel, not this minimalist action.

This page, in the eventual rewrite, would be have more panels on it, the ones already here would be shrunk down and used to better advantage. I think the reasons Mr. Ward had behind it being this way was using the good ole 8.5" x 11" paper.

PAGE 30

The fight between Reesa and Dragonwolf ends when Reesa realizes her target has escaped.

Once the fight is over, Dragonwolf turns all emo and broody in the last panel. So after that "big fight scene" it looks like what has actually happened, taken everything into context, is as follows:

Reesa shows up and she argues with Dragonwolf, culminating in Reesa throwing a dart at Dragonwolf which misses, but he dodges, setting him up perfectly for Reesa to kick him.

Dragonwolf stands up and they argue some more, then David Black shoots at them, which they both dodge, allowing him to get away, and Reesa and Dragonwolf argue some more with Reesa kicking at him again, but he block/dodges.

Akira then kicks at Reesa and misses, then she slugs him right across the face.

End fight, and that took like 5 pages. Stretched out a bit, I think, mainly because of the few panels per page. But going back to my argument about a lot of words per page in those talky talky pages working well for a weekly webcomic I think applies equally to this particular fight scene. How? Because in the opposite of the talking, the fight scenes have very little information, thus building the tension of the fight.

It appears that the fight is over. I like Reesa's pose in the next to last panel, especially as it is more dynamic and poised than Akira's pose in the next panel. Reesa looks ready for more action, especially since she came looking for a fight. Dragonwolf, on the other hand, is ready for it to be over. He'd rather talk it out, and blame her for Black escaping. Which, if she hadn't shown up in the first place, Dragonwolf would have been able to follow Black and gain more information on the missing girl.

PAGE 31

Reesa, having lost her target, leaves. But not without foreshadowing a future meeting with our hero.

And yet another "wasted" page with only two panels and no big reveal or stunning action, just Reesa taking her leave in classic Mr. Ward silhouette. I used the same brick image to fill in part of the wall on this page as I did at the beginning of this scene. This is one of the pages that doesn't lend itself to a lot of color, other than Dragonwolf's face, and maybe some creative shading on the background of the first panel.

A possible way to edit this into the rewrite would be to combine part of the previous page with its previous page of two panels, and move this into a split panel on page 30. It would cut out an entire page of the comic, and since it wouldn't be the first to do that, this would be shortened by at least 3 pages so far.

Looking at another possible solution to this, I could also see this entire page being shrunk down to a single panel, with Reesa's departure in the distance, but same panel as this shot of Dragonwolf. Will it have to be redrawn? Not necessarily. It could be done with some creative Photoshop skills. The hard part would be cutting out the outline of Dragonwolf in the second panel, especially around the face, having to cut away at his beard. But since I have done that before, this shouldn't be a problem.

The next few pages I know can also be shortened up, and maybe take back a page there as well. We will have to see how the rewrite goes once an artist is found.

PAGE 32

Dragonwolf heads home to recuperate and get a "little" help.

Here we get our first look at a couple things. One is the sparse, yet obviously spacious, interior of Akira's home. The other thing we see is some significance to the heart-shaped pendant he constant has around his neck. It might be harder to see in some of the more recent pages, but if you go back to when he visits Sgt. O'Donnell, and even at the beginning when James Grant comes to see him, it is there.

I don't want to reveal too much of this before the next page, so I will talk a little more about the art and style of the page.

This page should be about half it's size. The establishing shot of Akira's apartment window, complete with the moon hovering over it (I used a moon brush in Photoshop to get it to look like that, still not sure if I should have done it on the splash page where Dragonwolf is first revealed as just a clock in front of the skyline), along with the other two images could have been done in the top half of the page, and the next page brought in to two large panels in the bottom half. This is what learning about how to write a comic and design the panel layout does for you.

I do like how this page looks as is, but the way Mr. Ward drew Akira's eyes in shadow in the last panel I am not thrilled about. It almost makes it look like he has on a mask of some kind at this point, and we know his mask doesn't look like that.

PAGE 33

Introducing dagen, Akira's "little familiar" of which his grandfather spoke. What can he do? How does he help? Answers coming soon!

And here we see what is in that heart-shaped pendant. This is a point of contention between Akira and his grandfather. His grandfather doesn't like that Akira uses a Japanese familiar with his Mohawk Indian magick. Whether or not he feels it corrupts the medicine, or if it isn't as effective because the familiar isn't native to this land, isn't shown yet (and I'm not telling). This is something that may come to the forefront in a future storyline (hint: it will).

I understand why Mr. Ward decided to make this three panels in one page, to give more detail to dagen,the little dragon, especially (yes I am mentioning it once again) since he drew these on 8.5" x 11" paper. I do like some of the detail and shading he provided on the little beast. My inks reflected the pencils fairly accurately. But I truly believe that these three panels could have been combined into the previous page. The top two could have been stacked on the left side with a larger single panel on the right, in direct counterpoint to the top three panels of one large panel on the left and two stacked panels on the right.

It would make for a better flow to the story, the artwork, and quite possible the layout. I may end up doing some of these changes to see how well they do work, at least the changes I can do without any redrawing of full pages. I think this page combined with the previous one would be a good place to start, mainly because there is so little wording on the two pages.

PAGE 34

dagen is his name, cute magick familiar is his game! And that is not a typo, not capitalizing his name. It was an early decision when the character was created, that he have a limited vocabulary and grasp of grammar since he is still a beast, albeit a magickal one. And one of the things the character is adamant about is the spelling of his name. He recognizes it in written form, but not with a capital letter.

Now we get a name to the face, and we get a sense of scale, too, with Akira's hand in the background, and the pendant in the foreground. I really like this page as it shows something about the character of the beast, and has some artistic value to the image overall.

That being said (uh oh here we go again on the critiques), I am of two minds if this should be a splash page or not. This is the third splash page in this issue, I think, without going back to look. Even if it is just the second splash page, that is at least one too many for a comic, especially for one that is a bit stretched out to begin with.

And I know I have a lot of criticism for this comic, but it is my comic that I wrote. I should be able to critique it and see things I should have done differently in the first place, and find ways to improve the story, the comic structure of this issue, as well as the entire book overall, including the artwork. And shouldn't I be looking for ways to improve my storytelling? Damn right I should. If I can admit the faults, and where it can be strengthened, I can help others with similar issues.

PAGE 35

Akira explains the case to dagen.

This is a nice looking page. I like the image in the first panel, and think I have also used that for some Dragonwolf wallpaper (<a href="http://comics.circus13productions.com/dragonwolf-wallpaper-artwork/">available here</a>). The third panel gives us a different, alternate possible mask for Turmoil. Will we see his look with a final costume in a future issue? I can guarantee it, since he is the one holding on the Jennifer Grant, in whatever capacity she is in.

I also think Mr. Ward captured dagen's disgust with David Black quite well in the last panel. Not easy to do with a specifically stylized dragon.

Speaking of, I think it is time to discuss him and the name Dragonwolf a little more in depth. Way back when this comic was formulating in my mind, I was the bass player for a band called Dragonheart. Keep in mind this was before the movie with the same name, starring Dennis Quaid and Sean Connery's voice was released in theaters. At the time, we were the only known Dragonheart in town.

My drummer and I came up with an image of a band mascot (the guitar player didn't care, we were a three piece) of a dragon holding a heart-shaped gem, and his wings around him were in the shape of a heart. I looked at my drummer after we approved a drawing I did of the band's "symbol/mascot," and I asked him, "So let's create a super hero based on this name."

He said, "He's a mage and that guy is his familiar." I took that and combined it with this story about a kidnapped girl I had been working on, making the detective into a mage, and then some. I rewrote a few parts and it ended up becoming the story you are reading here.

PAGE 36

Oh, look yet another splash page! This could have been one quarter of the size on another page, either previous or next page. There is minimal dialogue--one line from each character--that wouldn't take up too much more room if this were compressed down to a smaller panel.

This, I fear, is another victim of original page size of 8.5" x 11" not giving enough room for smaller panels and detailed artwork. My current comic that I am attempting to draw myself--to varying degrees of acceptable to me artwork--I am still using that same page size for drawing, but I am using it as the actual panels.

So for me to do a four panel page, all the panels of equal size, I draw one panel per 8.5" x 11" drawing page. That way I can get some more detailed artwork in there, and still have enough room for expansive images. When it comes to splash pages, or larger than a quarter page images, I do have larger paper for that, but then the issue of scanning the drawing into the computer becomes a problem. I have to stitch at least 2-4 images together to get it all scanned and looking neat, and there are still some troublesome parts of the image. I will be looking into a large bed scanner to help with this, but that is further down the road because I just can't afford it at the moment.

Now for the artwork on this page, this is one of my favorite pictures of dagen, probably because he is so prominent in the page, and has a lot of detail. I like how Mr. Ward took my original designs of dagen and improved on them immensely. The webcomic I am drawing has multiple dragon characters and their design, at least of their faces, comes directly from Mr. Ward's design of dagen.

PAGE 37

dagen gets a little smitten with the missing girl.

And yet another page of padded panels. After 36 pages of artwork, I understand Mr. Ward was really pushing it. This book is almost a fully double length issue, but this could have been cut down to the first two panels being side by side and more room for two more panels at the bottom, or at least one more large one, thus eliminating the last page and shortening this overall page count by yet another page, cutting us back to I think about 33 out of 38. Cutting out five pages due to editing I would call a good day.

A couple notes on the actual artwork of this page. Firstly, I like dagen's position in the first panel. He's not being so graceful here as in previous panels. I think this could be attributed to him still stretching after being cooped up in that little pendant. It could also be a little bit of a playful side, since is apparently attracted to the picture of Jennifer Grant.

As far as the picture of Jennifer Grant goes, I distinctly remember Mr. Ward telling me that after three failed attempts at trying to recreate her image from the earlier page, he just gave up and traced the photograph. I didn't have to do that with the magic of Photoshop. All I had to do was take the final edited image from the comic page and paste it here. That way I was one hundred percent assured the image was exactly the same because it was exactly the same!

The last two panels are a throwback to the first scene where Mr. Ward did close-ups of just Akira's and James Grant's eyes to convey more emotion.

PAGE 38

Akira and dagen strike a dramatic pose as we wrap up the first issue of Dragonwolf! Be watching for part 2 of The Blackwolf Samurai coming soon!

Here we are on the very last page. And look, it is another splash page. This one can be excused because it is the last page of the book. Usually I try to reserve the splash for the first and/or last page as it either establishes content for the scene, or it shows some vital twist or reveal for setting up the next issue, or as a climax in a single shot story.

This page, especially with the curtains in the window, the shape of the window, and Dragonwolf lurking in the back, all remind me immensely of Matt Wagner's Grendel artwork. I am a huge fan of the writer/artist and the character (I have a tattoo of the Grendel mask on my inner right forearm, one of four comic inspired tattoos) and was thoroughly pleased with how this page turned out.

Some of the text at the bottom is outdated already, seeing as how artists for everything have dropped out without having even drawn a single page of any of those comics. I have a couple sketches of artwork from one or two, but nothing else.

Moving forward, I have plans to hire artists as I can afford them, to draw some shorter stories, to start gaining more interest in Circus-13 Comics and start expanding out. As of May 25, 2016, I have one short horror story on the way, exclusive to Circus-13 Comics website, and one more to be published in an anthology in the UK in either July or October. I will let everyone know when they are available!

"Fiend" by Peter Stenson was about what I expected

Fiend was an interesting premise: meth-heads survive the zombie apocalypse because they are meth-heads. But because they are meth-heads, they can't have their own society to remain safe because that fix, that desire, that hunger, for the next fix makes them just as selfish, mindless, and animalistic as the zombies.
 
I ended up not finishing the book, not really caring for the main character. Some of the first person descriptions were a little too graphic, done more for shock value than anything (such as the bloody zombie girl sitting on the couch like a used tampon), and detracted from the story. The lack of quotation marks throughout also made it difficult to follow if it was just the main character's internal monologue or actual dialogue between characters.
 
One thing that I did like was the zombies giggled. That made them all the creepier, especially when i thought of other zombie movies and shows like Walking Dead and Dawn of the Dead. How creepy would those undead have been if they walked around giggling all the time?
 
Sadly, while this was a new take on the overly bloated zombie market (much like the undead themselves), it wasn't that fresh or inventive... Much like the undead themselves. 

Isaac Merrit Singer: American Sewing Machine

This was my research paper for my American History to 1870 class this year.  I just got my grade back on it, a 90 out of 100 (an A-).  We had to pick someone from our textbook to write about.  I first chose Ben Franklin, but there was SOOOO much info on him I got swamped with what to do to keep it to 5-7 pages.  Isaac Merrit Singer (who modernized the sewing machine, he didn't actually invent it) had an almost passing reference in two sentences, which was enough of a mention to warrant my attention.  So he was my topic.

  Isaac Merritt Singer is a true American classic: born October 27, 1811 in Oswego, New York, he improved greatly on an existing product -- the sewing machine -- making it far easier to use in the home, and created a company making his product, and using a business model that still exists to this day, well over a century later.

His Early Life

     Born in Oswego, New York in 1811, Isaac Merritt Singer grew up fast, leaving his home at age twelve. When he was nineteen, he began working in his older brother's machine shop.  It was there that he learned the trade of being a machinist, the trade that would ultimately leave his name on sewing machines around the world.¹

     He grew into a tall man; at six feet four inches, he towered over most people, yet didn't believe that machining was his future.  He wanted to follow a different vocation, that of the stage.  Isaac wanted to be an actor.

     In 1830, around the time he started working for his brother, Isaac married the first of his two wives, Catharine Maria Haley -- who was fifteen at the time -- by which they had two children, William and Lillian.²  When William was five years old and Lillian still not born yet, Isaac moved his family to New York City where he worked in a press shop for a year.  He left the press shop to become an agent for a company of actors touring through Baltimore, Maryland.  While working as the agent, he met a woman named Mary Ann Sponsler and because thoroughly enchanted to the point where he proposed to her though he never followed through.³  He did, however return to New York in 1837 where Isaac became a father twice that year: his wife gave birth to Lillian and his mistress Mary Ann arrived soon after, already pregnant.  She gave birth to Isaac's second son, Isaac Augustus.

     Isaac and Catharine's marriage went downhill from there, Catharine suspecting and possibly even knowing about Mary Ann.  However, Isaac and Catharine didn't officially divorce until January 23 of 1860.  Mary Ann, once she found out Isaac was already married, surely wasn't happy.⁴  Isaac did the only thing he could: he left town.  He went back to Baltimore with Mary Ann and told people in Baltimore that she was his wife.⁵

Isaac the Inventor

     Isaac left New York and the mess he created with his wife, children, and his mistress to head to Chicago to work on the construction of the Illinois-Michigan canal.  It was while working on the canal in 1839 that Isaac obtained his first patent on a machine he had invented that drilled through rock.  He sold the patent to the I&M Canal Building Company for $2,000.⁶  With his newfound wealth, Isaac returned to his first love, acting.

     Isaac formed and acting troupe called the Merritt Players, using the stage name of Isaac Merritt (dropping the Singer from his name).    He even had Mary Ann Sponslor return to the stage as an actress, using the name Mary Ann Merritt.  The Merritt Players toured for about five years all over North America.⁷

     After a couple more jobs in printing and wood signs, Isaac landed in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where he developed a machine that gave him his second patent: a "machine for carving wood and metal."⁸

     Isaac Singer, at age 38, with two wives and eight children between them, returned to New York.  It was while he was in New York, trying to sell the machine that he was given an advance from a man named George B. Zieber -- a man who figured prominently in Singer's future -- to build a prototype of the wood and metal carving machine that actually worked.⁹  Along with the advance money from Zieber, Singer was also offered a place where sewing machines were being manufactured in Boston to set up his prototype once he built it.  The sewing machines were being built by the "moderately successful Lowell and Blodget Company"¹⁰ in a shop owned by Orson C. Phelps.

     And, in 1850, he once again packed up his family and moved, this time to Massachusetts.

Isaac the Innovator

     It was in Boston in 1850 that Isaac Singer got his idea for improving on the sewing machine.  Why not make it smaller and easier to use in the home?  Why shouldn't people be able to make their own clothes at home faster than sewing by hand?  That was what prompted the idea to make a smaller, more manageable sewing machine, but it wasn't how he started with the machines.

     At Phelps's shop in Boston, Phelps asked Singer to look at one of the machines and repair it if possible.  Singer, rather than repair the machine, saw that the machine would work more efficiently and reliably if the needle were straight rather than curved, and the shuttle -- the piece that moves the needle -- moved in a straight line rather than in a circle.¹¹  He also installed a presser-foot for feeding the fabric -- a part that the fabric sits on and pulls the fabric under the needle.¹²  He also designed the now-familiar shape of the sewing machine with the "arm" that extends out over the worktable that holds the needle over the "foot."  What all this did was make sewing more efficient and time-saving, improving the number of stitches from an experienced seamstresses 40 stiches per minute by hand to 900 stitches on the sewing machine.¹³

     Singer asked Zieber for financing, which he received, and became partners with Zieber and Phelps, creating the "Jenny Lind Sewing Machine," named for a Swedish songstress.  Singer applied for, and acquired, patents for his improvements to the sewing machine.  He did, however, lose a lawsuit for patent infringement in 1854 when he used Elias Howe's eye-pointed needle and lock-stitch method in the machine's methods of sewing.¹⁴  Yet it didn't stop him from manufacturing his machines in a partnership with Edward Clark.  They formed their partnership in 1851 and in nine years, the I. M. Singer & Company was the largest producer of sewing machines anywhere in the world.¹⁵

          Singer’s partnership with Clark made them both a lot of money.  Singer continued to refine the mechanics of his sewing machine with innovations like interchangeable parts and reducing the size and weight.  Clark, meanwhile, was streamlining the business side as Singer handled the manufacturing; he created purchase plans using installment payments as well as taking old sewing machines in as trade-ins on newer models, much like car purchases are done today.  The result was a booming business with soaring sales at about $10 per machine.¹⁶

     Singer aimed his marketing not only at commercial customers, but also at housewives.  With his inexpensive sewing machines, shown off in large showrooms, with a team of mechanics, sewing instructors and easily accessible replacement parts, the Singer sewing machine became a status symbol for self-reliant American families.¹⁷

     In 1863, a man named Ebenezer Butterick, a tailor, had his own innovation for the American household that went hand in hand with Singer’s sewing machines: dress patterns.  Combined with “America’s most popular sewing machine,”¹⁸ Butterick’s dress patterns made a powerful combination that made Singer a wealthy man but the time he died in 1875 on his British estate, “the Wigwam.”¹⁹

     Despite Singer’s womanizing and attraction to the theater, he was a great innovator in both his sewing machine and business model using credit and installment plans, all of which helped shape America’s modern credit system.  Singer might be famous for his sewing machine, but his other contributions helped form modern America.

Notes

     1. Evans, Harold.  They Made America. (New York: Little, Brown and Company, 2004). p 86

     2. "Isaac Merritt Singer." Encyclopædia Britannica. Encyclopædia Britannica Online. Encyclopædia Britannica Inc., 2012. Web. 31 Mar. 2012. <http://www.britannica.com/EBchecked/topic/545806/Isaac-Merrit-Singer>.

     3.  Evans, p 87-88

     4. "Isaac Merritt Singer." The Columbia Encyclopedia, 6th ed.. 2011. Encyclopedia.com. 31 Mar. 2012<http://www.encyclopedia.com/doc/1E1-Singer-IM.html>.

     5.  “Isaac Merritt Singer.” New World Encyclopedia. 2012. Web. 31 Mar. 2012. http://www.newworldencyclopedia.org/entry/Isaac_Merritt_Singer.

     6. Columbia Encyclopedia.

     7.  Encyclopædia Britannica.

     8. Bissel, D.C. The First Conglomerate: 145 Years of the Singer Sewing Machine Company. Brunswick, ME: Audenreed Press, 1999.  p 45

     9. Encyclopædia Britannica.

     10. Encyclopædia Britannica.

     11. Brandon, Ruth. Singer and the Sewing Machine: A Capitalist Romance. New York: Kodansha International, 1977. p 95-97

     12. Brandon, p. 100

     13. Encyclopædia Britannica.

     14. New World Encyclopedia

     15. Bissel, p. 60

     16. Encyclopædia Britannica.

     17. Encyclopædia Britannica.

     18. Columbia Encyclopedia.

     19.  New World Encyclopedia.

Bibliography

Evans, Harold.  They Made America. (New York: Little, Brown and Company, 2004).

"Isaac Merritt Singer." Encyclopædia Britannica. Encyclopædia Britannica Online. Encyclopædia Britannica Inc., 2012. Web. 31 Mar. 2012. <http://www.britannica.com/EBchecked/topic/545806/Isaac-Merrit-Singer>.

"Isaac Merritt Singer." The Columbia Encyclopedia, 6th ed.. 2011. Encyclopedia.com. 31 Mar. 2012<http://www.encyclopedia.com/doc/1E1-Singer-IM.html>.

Bissel, D.C. The First Conglomerate: 145 Years of the Singer Sewing Machine Company. Brunswick, ME: Audenreed Press, 1999. 

Brandon, Ruth. Singer and the Sewing Machine: A Capitalist Romance. New York: Kodansha International, 1977.

“Isaac Merritt Singer.” New World Encyclopedia. 2012. Web. 31 Mar. 2012. http://www.newworldencyclopedia.org/entry/Isaac_Merritt_Singer.